I don't even know if anyone still reads my blog. All I know is that there's been a growth of spammers on my tagboard.

As of now, I'm nursing a heart ache.

I'm tired of thinking of all the what if's and whys, coz clearly it wouldn't change a thing. Our paths met, went through a crossroad and got separated.

I'm really heartbroken.

I'm a happy kid coz I did unexpectedly well for my exams! Alhamdulillah. I did some major blunders, like missing my online quiz, late report submission, but thankfully I managed to pass all. Some with flying colours too!

I like the way how this year is ending for me. Just recently finished a big Xmas event of work, which totally drained me out. I had to clock in extra hours, everything was pretty much straining form the planning to execution. This is partially because of the great team I'm working with, though they maybe young, all of them put in an equal effort to make this event a success. Yeay!

Ash is settling well with his work too. Though his shift hours suck, I'm slowly adapting to the changes. Nothing is gained without any hardships. We usually avoid talking about the future mainly coz he doesn't like it. But somehow unknowingly we do. I don't want anything just yet, I just pray that the future will settle in well for the both of us. Insya'allah.

As of now, I'm really looking forward to January. It's not gonna be as hectic as before, gonna take this few week to bum around and have tons of coffee and cake. All of these before school starts end of Jan.

Right about now, i'm still waiting for the bus to work and it's still not here yet. Gahhh!

It's a Sunday and I'm still bed, I deserve a few mins more after a hectic full shift the day before. The house is empty and there's no food, what a great Sunday morning.

Maybe I could make pancakes? Omg there's icecream in the fridge too.

If you ask me, I never did really quite like December for the past 3 years. Lookin at the line I'm in, it's one of the busiest month. Adding on, it's crazier this year. Imagine this, early Nov got jitterbug for exam, mid Nov mad mugging for exam, end Nov sit for exam, then straight back to work, from one pile of event to another. All this planning, preparation and execution it's damn tiring. Instead I'm looking forward go January, prolly gonna clear whatever leave and just be a potato couch, chips and icecream in hands watching Gossip Girl.

Oh, and yesterday I saw something I've never seen before. A friend of mine was shaking so badly in pain. I almost had my first ride in an ambulance. Thankfully, she's allright now, alhamdulillah.

That aside, I went to bed feeling so sad yesterday. I don't wish to resort to pouring whatever I feel here, makes my situation even more pathetic. But then again, yah, it's kinda depressing. Nevertheless I managed to sleep through it. At least.

Ahhhhhh, what should I whip up for brunch?!

I felt so contained yesterday night. All I did was just sleep it off. Let's see just how long I can do this.

I'm taking a 2 weeks rest before I start mugging for the exams. I remember how sucky it was, all of my off days were dedicated to assignments. It's 11am now, I'm rolling in bed and still thinking of what to do later.

Ash has been going for interviews lately, ORD-ing in December. I'm so proud of him, I never thought he would be this proactive. I'll support him in whatever ways I can, from a little good luck to reminding him of firm handshake. I see myself settling down with this man, though maybe it's too soon say it, but I've faith. I told him this before, go get your dreams and not just settle with what is comfortable. He wants to own his own foodplace someday, with his skills, experience and aspiration, maybe he just will. And I'll be the one running the business part of the business. Insya'allah.

Talking about career, it's been close to 3 years I've been this company. I'm happy with where I am right now, but I do wanna do other things in the future. I'm hoping to carry the skills I have wherever I go next. Once I graduate, my degree and experience will definately bring me somewhere, insya'allah.

Nuff with the seriousness.

Anyways, bumming at home today sounds like a plan.

I seriously need to change my lifestyle, just maybe. I greet mornings at 12pm whenever I'm working afternoon shift. How like that? Am I a living pig or a wannabe tai-tai?

Now that's school over, period, I'm kinda glad I have more time to myself. No more last min rushing, or worries to submit and assignment. Exams are coming end of Nov for me, I don't have a choice but to work really hard for this paper. Since I missed the 20% weightage of online quiz. Fuckity fuck.

Everytime I step in, I came out all wrong.

And then I keep telling myself, tests Fron God. There's a reason why I'm with you, there's a reason why this happens. Whatever the reason, I hope it's all good.

They say the best person to love is someone who not only can make you happy, but one who can tear you apart, rage you red and worry the wits out of you. Bearing in mind, such emotions don't bring positive repercussions all the time.

And this what in feeling right about now.

My oh my, it's September already. That's really fast. Right about now, everyone's still in the midst of celebrating Hari Raya.

Somehow, I paused for abit, and thought of how soon 2011 is gonna greet me sooner than I thought. There's no way that I can slow it down, I need to some catching up! Have you? I shan't ponder much longer about time now, it won't change a thing. The only thing that I can change is, how I wanna spent these last few months before the new year.

So, I'm 22 this year, already. I'm a daughter, a sister, a partner, a friend, a manager and a student, all at one go. What a joy ride. I've seen and experience quite a few things this year - my niece taking her first few steps, my dad warded in ICU for 2 months; just to name a few. Adding on, myself fussing over school again. And on top of this, all the other little things that matter. :)

Talking about school, it sucks, like SUCKS BIG TIME, almost all assignments are due during the festive period. I just can't stop complaining, on Facebook, Twitter and now my Blog too. Other than that, I pretty much enjoyed being busy with assignments and deadlines. The thrill of completing a prefect(well maybe close to perfect) piece of work, within a given time, gives me a sense of satisfaction. No doubt part time studying isn't easy, but I'm managing well, aside with late nights and complaints, alhamdulillah. I'm taking time to blog while waiting a certain Statistics application to be downloaded, how exciting.

Even if I can blog at the convenience of my phone, I'm just so lazy most of time. But when I finally do, like now, suddenly I have so many things to say.

Oh, just a funny thought I'd like to share. I had this crazy idea of setting up a party company, party organizers to be exact. I'm not surprised with this random thought of mine, I work in a children's environment, m workplace is about fun fun fun and I deal parties most of time. So why not right? Because I believe it can be a flourishing business if you know which ropes to pull, and where your resources are. This crazy idea is just so tempting.

And oh ya, not forgetting my ultimate business dream, a book cafe!

I have to end abruptly here, heading back to my Statistics assignment!